Mileage

Yeah… so that whole switching to Wednesdays thing didn’t work out so well. Oops. Anyway…

About a year and a half ago I was in a D&D 3.5 game. I was the only one with a hard copy of the Player’s Handbook I just left it at the house we played at. It’s been there ever since until yesterday when I finally got around to picking it up. George, the guy who was holding on to it, made sure to point out some light damage to the corners the book took since I left it at his place.

He apologized, and I said I was ok with it. And I meant it, too.

I used to be pretty uptight about the condition of my game books, before I realized that what wears books out is getting used. The books I have that are in the best condition are the ones I haven’t really used very much. Alternatively, the book I’ve gotten the most use of, the one that I used to carry with me every where I went, Vampire: the Masquerade (Revised Edition), is in terrible condition.

That, my friends, is mileage!

So don’t worry about frayed corners or worn bindings or scratched covers. It’s just what love looks like.

ONE OF US! ONE OF US! HEE HEE HEE!

First of all folks, sorry about last week. I have no excuse, I just completely spaced it. I forgot all about the blog until very late.

This week has been kind of exciting, role-playing wise, because a friend of mine just started her very first game! She’s playing an elf witch in a Pathfinder game. I’ve really enjoyed talking to her about it, following along as she makes her character and learns about the game.

(And in the process, I’ve also finally gotten around to looking at Pathfinder. Everything I’ve heard about Pathfinder, and from what I can tell the whole point of it, is preserving the 3.5 D&D rules once fourth edition came about. But they made changes, and I’m not sure what to make of them. Adding class features seems good, though the new favored class system seems weird. I guess there’s nothing wrong with Pathfinder, but I think I’d prefer to just stick with all my 3.5 material. Stick what you know, right?)

Anyway, the two are similar enough that I can understand the lingo, so it’ll be lots of fun following my friend as she wades further and deeper into my mostest favoritist pastime. I always get a thrill watching new comers to gaming. It’s like a bonus to the group of people I can share my passion with, another person with whom I can engage in that most sacred and honorable of activities, geeking the fuck out.

Heroes?

Today’s post was inspired, in part, by “M for Mature” by Ben “Yahtzee” Croshaw, and calls back to some of the things I’ve talked about lately. Also, the character names were taken from this page.

 

One evening, as the last of the sun’s rays began to withdraw behind the great mountains to the east, a party of orcs made camp for the night after a long day of adventuring. The fire had been provided by Ugzod, the group’s sorcerer, and above it hung a now deceased wild boar, which was caught by the fighter Dur. Nazsnaga, a druid, didn’t approve, but chose to find some fruit for herself instead of starting an argument over it. The camp site had been consecrated by Shaksnik, cleric and priestess, and the party was settling in for a nice meal followed by good night’s sleep.

Standing guard at the edge of the camp, the ranger Dreggut suddenly picked up a scent that alarmed him. He moved quietly to the others. “Be on your guard,” he said, “I don’t think we’re alone.”

Suddenly, from all around them, another adventuring party emerged from the trees, weapons drawn and ready for battle. They weren’t orcs though. The halfing was wielding a crossbow, and had a backpack that was clearly full of treasure. The elf woman, wearing the barest of garments, held a wooden staff aloft as light streamed from it. The human, wielding an insanely large broadsword, appeared to be one massive, solid muscle clad in scaled armor. And the dwarf, naturally, had an ax.

“Prepare for death, vile creatures!” the elf shouted, “Behold the light of Corellon Larethian and dismay!” But the light coming from her staff only served to illuminate the goosbumps on her bare skin.

“My goodness,” responded Shaksnik, “do the elves really make their women dress like that? You must be freezing, you poor dear! Here, take my coat.”

As she tried to hand her coat to the elf, the human stuck is sword into her face, nearly taking an eye.

“Back, monster! I will not allow evil such as you taint our cleric!”

Shaksnik looked at him, confusion and hurt feelings mixed on her face. “But, I’m a cleric myself.”

At this point Dur felt compelled to interject. “What evil? What are you talking?”

“You, laddie” the dwarf said. “Everyone knows orcs are evil.”

Ugzod burst out laughing. “Dude,” he said, anachronisms be damned, “You’re calling us evil, you bigoted fuck?”

“Yeah” Dreggut added, “Not to mention all that loot the halfling’s carrying. I suppose you guys bought all of that, and the original owners are still alive and well.”

“Uhm…” the halfling responded.

“Enough” the human shouted “We shall do battle!”

“Let’s not,” Nazsnaga said, “We’re all adults here, I’m sure we can come up with some kind of peaceful, mutually beneficial agreement and part ways without bloodshed.”

 

The next morning, Ugzod, Dreggut, Nazsnaga, Dur and Shaksnik were dead, their bodies left, without ceremony, to the crows. And the other party were in a nearby village, being celebrated as heroes.